voodoo

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The Marionnettiste of Versailles and Other Oddities by Adam Millard

Published January 13, 2015 by Shadow Girl

Warning: This book contains – A sadistic mortician, demonic teddies, murderous sparrows, sentient robots, scenes of the apocalypse, feeders, lycanthropes, serial-killers, war, jealous housewives, cannibalism, creepy-ass neighbours, suicide, flesh-eating parasites, zombies, cowboys, mothmen, Nyogtha, Appalachian folklore, cancer, asteroids, invisible crocodiles, and voodoo. A collection of previously published and brand new macabre and weird tales from bestselling British author, Adam Millard.

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Putting warning labels on books can be better than recommendations. (rawr!)

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This anthology contains a wide variety of horrors told in 25 short stories. Some shorts are new to this collection, with additional shorts having been seen previously in different publications. (They were all new to me this time. Bonus.)
Cuddly & creepy stuffed animals, ancient legends re-imagined, and even some disturbing stories of love. In Can You Read That Asteroid from Here? I learned some important tips to follow if I ever get my interstellar drivers license, (‘lefty brakey, righty speedy.’) When I started reading Hair, I thought that Joy Killar had secretly gotten to Adam and had him write about the horrors of finding my stray hairs EVERYWHERE, and about them secretly plotting her imminent demise. But, it was a story about a serial killer who might have appreciated my shedding. Stories like Bug Boy, and 7:17 From Suicide Station didn’t hold back on the ‘bum me out’ vibes, but there were plenty of giggles to even things out. When Gladys confronted her husband about his mistress, her question was ‘What’s She Got That I Haven’t?’, you can imagine the multiple replies that could have fit. But, in the end, there was only one answer. If you’ve read Adam Millard before, you know to expect some dark humor peppered throughout his work. What surprised, (and delighted), me were the Easter Eggs hidden within. I love when authors slyly reference their other works, or revisit characters from other stories. I’m sure that if I had read more of the Adam’s work prior to reading this – I’d have found more. But, that just makes me look forward to reading this again in the future.

Marionnettiste Promo lit

You can find The Marionnettiste of Versailles and Other Oddities on Amazon, Goodreads, Library Thing, and Shelfari.

Visit Adam Millard on his websiteAmazon, Goodreads, Twitter, Facebook, and Google+.

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THE SINISTER MR. CORPSE by Jeff Strand

Published July 11, 2014 by Shadow Girl

“Every day’s a sunshiny day when you don’t have maggots and spiders eating your guts.” -Stanley Dabernath

cover

Stanley Dabernath is nobody special. He’s just a regular guy, who hates every minute of his miserable existence. $60,000 in debt, eating ramen noodles three times a day, and recently homeless since he just got evicted from his apartment.
His video distribution company, Demented Whackos, should have made him a millionaire, not a 35 year old man who lives where he works, and steals booze from his parent’s house. He won’t give up, though! All he needs is one sicko product to put Demented Whackos Video on the map, and he’s working on that project right now!

CENSORED

EXTREME FISHING is going to be a hit, he can feel it! Heavy metal music, gratuitous T & A, explosions, beatings, and of course… buckets of blood & guts! THIS is going to be the one, EXTREME FISHING is going to turn things around for poor Stanley Dabernath! Things might not be so bad for him after all, and he starts to feel better than he has in a very long time. Hey, he even jumped out of of the way and avoided being hit by the semi-truck that was barreling towards him! Quick moves! Nice going, Stanley!
Too bad his luck hadn’t changed completely. The truck, the same one that narrowly missed hitting Stanley, tipped over and crashed down on his left foot. If his luck had changed just a bit more, then he would have limped away. Sadly, Life said “Hahaha! Nope!”
Stanley found no humor in his situation as the truck spilled it’s contents all over him, and he drowned right there.
In milk.

Breaking News!

Breaking News!

BIZARRE REALITY is taking a huge chance by airing a prime time TV special – LIVE. They have Project Second Chance as a guest, and have spent major cash advertising tonight’s show. “Witness the very first resurrection of a human corpse on LIVE TV!”
No spoilers here, really. If it didn’t work, we wouldn’t have a story! The corpse is Stanley Dabernath, and the scientists have successfully reanimated him for the entire viewing audience.
He’s alive… ALIVE! Muah-ha-ha-ha…
Alive, but not without some damage – he had started to decay a bit, so his coloring is kind of grey, and he smells none too fresh. You don’t need to be pretty to become a huge celebrity these days, and that’s exactly what Stanley has become. A celebrity with hated a nickname! The press started calling him ‘The Incredible Mr. Corpse’, then the world follows suit. Despite the new moniker, Mr. Corpse has finally made it. Fame, wealth, groupies… he’s living the dream. He even has a personal assistant, Veronica, to help him adjust to the lifestyle. She’s earning her salary, though – You can take the life out of Stanley, but you can’t remove the personality!
The story follows the transformation – from Stanley to The Incredible Mr. Corpse. Then… the annoying Mr. Corpse, the big-headed Mr. Corpse, the impossible Mr. Corpse… Eventually, the curious Mr. Corpse realizes that Project Second Chance may not be what they seem.

This is another novel by Jeff Strand that kept me laughing from start to finish. It’s dedicated to his wife, and I’ve often wondered if all of these characters stem from his everyday sense of humor. She must be cracking up all the time! Or, on the verge of smothering him with a pillow 😉
Along with Stanley’s shenanigans and smart assery, there are very serious, and sometimes uncomfortable moments. It wouldn’t be a true Strand story if it didn’t make me shed a few tears. Stanley grew as a person when he became a ‘zombie’. He has to learn things the hard way, but he’s a guy that I would love to know IRL, (if he picks up that deodorant gig!).

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I don’t know what Stanley’s assistant, Veronica, is thinking – Stanley is VERY quotable…

“If you eat me, you’ll just be a cannibal! And that’s shameful! Nobody likes cannibals!”

Gleefully Macabre

@JeffStrand

Goodreads

http://www.amazon.com/Sinister-Mr-Corpse-Jeff-Strand-ebook/dp/B004O6MURM/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1404619368&sr=1-1&keywords=Sinister+Mr.+Corpse

Spend Valentine’s with a Lucky Stiff ❣

Published January 15, 2014 by Shadow Girl

LuckyStiff

Need some loving this Valentine’s Day? Looking for a hard body, and don’t care whether it’s dead or alive? Got an itch no one can seem to scratch? Well, I guarantee Peter Lyles will not only scratch that itch, but leave you itching for more! Join Tonia Brown and Peter Lyles (and me, of course!) as we spend Valentine’s weekend giving away his unlife story.
You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll get all worked up and might even have to change your undies.
He is just that good ❣

This Facebook event starts on February 14 at 12:00pm and will continue, hard & strong, until February 16 at 11:45pm ❣
The concept of this event is very simple: You get to spend a virtual weekend in the company of Peter Lyles. He has promised to slip away from his lady friends and spend the weekend answering all of your most intimate questions about his most intimate parts. All the while Tonia will give away free downloads of his undead story, Lucky Stiff: Memoirs of an Undead Lover.

❤ Take a look at the discussion of LUCKY STIFF on the Cover to Cover page ❤

Can’t wait to read it? Than go ahead and grab that bad boy by the horn! Tonia likes money, and you like hot, hot sexy sex. It’s a win-win!

˙·٠•●♥ ❤ Get LUCKY! Have a STIFF Valentine’s Day! ❤♥●•٠·˙

❤ Want to get to know Tonia a little better? See what she had to say when she joined us for BBB’s very first Coffee Talk author interview ~ Coffee with Tonia Brown

LUCKY STIFF: MEMOIRS OF AN UNDEAD LOVER By Tonia Brown

Published March 16, 2013 by Shadow Girl

Lucky Stiff: Memoirs of an Undead Lover
By Tonia Brown
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Zombie Erotica. You know these individual words, but these words together? It gives you a ‘o.O’ moment. Zombie Erotica could lead to some very disturbing thoughts and imagery. Let me assure you, this is not a disgusting or disturbing story! Quite the contrary. Tonia is a master at erotica, and a master at zombies, for LUCKY STIFF she brings the two together and creates a novel like none other. A novel that induced laughter, tears, excitement, and a little tingly feeling in the nether-regions ::winks:: Yes. She’s that damn good.
This is a story about one of my favorite Peter characters. (You read my posts, you know who the other one is. THIS Peter is the original Peter in my literary love life. Peter Lyles.)

Peter and his buddies are off on an epic Spring Break trip, one that they’re going to make sure ends up in the record books. Off to New Orleans for some much needed R & R, their vacation takes a wicked wrong turn when Peter downs a fistfull of Roofies – instead of the sleeping pills his friend ‘Drugstore Dave’ said they were. A few hours later… Dave, Jack, and Mooch find Peter right where they left him – only now he’s cold to the touch & blue! While freaking out and contemplating a future filled with back-door invasions from their prison husbands, Mooch remembers Madam Sangrail – the Voodoo Queen, from his old neighborhood. “People said she could do things. Or… un-do them.” Madam Sangrail’s flavor of magick¹ brings back an undead Peter – a kind of undead you’ve never known existed, but, the kind of undead that makes the impending Zombie Apocalypse sound like it might not seem so bad!

Be sure to check out my interview with Tonia, links to her and all her work HERE, in the ‘Coffee Talk‘ pillow fort!

This was the first book of Tonia’s that I read, it’s the book that led to my first real conversation (& eventual unbreakable bond) with Joy Killar, which led to meeting & becoming friends with Tonia! Funny how life works. All this from downloading a sample of a book because a book cover discovered during a Google image search intrigued me!

¹ Magick: Not to be confused with stage “magic.” Magick is art of utilizing natural forces around us to bring about change. Magick is neutral, neither good, nor evil. The practitioner decides how they would like to focus this natural energy.

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