Felo De Se: The Suicide of Jeremy Price by Shaun Hupp

Felo de se

Noun
Latin for “Felon of himself.”
1. A person who commits suicide or an unlawful malicious act resulting in his or her death.
2. An act of deliberate self-destruction

*A story that made this reviewer get a little emotional, and this discussion a little squishy. Don’t get used to it.

The Darkest of Fiction

This isn’t the extreme horror of Shaun’s that we’ve discussed in the past, but it is ‘the darkest of fiction’. Taken from the introduction: “The monster in this story is not some creature hiding in your closet or a thug in an alleyway with a knife. It’s something everyone can and probably has struggled with. Some writers would stay away from this topic to protect their readers. I won’t do that. The subject matter is meant to make you uncomfortable. If it makes you angry, good. If it makes you cry, good. I hope my words use your emotions as paints and splash them across a black canvas. And no. I did not mean ‘blank.’”
Felo De Se is just what his profile promises – ‘a story that will tug at your heartstrings one moment and the next, shake you to your very core, sending you on an emotional rollercoaster into the darkest corners of your imagination.’

When his life went down a dark path and was too much for him to handle, Jeremy Price took the only option he thought he had left. Jeremy ended his life and now his family and friends have to deal with the aftermath. Only Jeremy will be there with them as well.

This is not the end of Jeremy Price. 
His spirit will not move on to any sort of afterlife. He must wander his hometown, watching those who cared for him. His wife and two kids. A friend. His father. A childhood acquaintance. They all ask themselves why Jeremy did what he did, trying to solve a puzzle no one really wants to solve and one, Jeremy might not even have the answer to.

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This story is tearing me up inside, and I keep imagining how Shaun had to feel while researching, and writing, (or dealing with personally). It’s a hard subject to talk about from every angle.  Quoted from story:  ‘It’s impossible to describe and even harder to survive.’.  My dad said something once that really stuck with me, “Suicide is contagious”.  Sadly, it’s true.

I realize that Jeremy Price is a fictional character, but I really wish I’d known him.

Every story within these pages seems to reach out and touch me on a very personal level, (if it isn’t something specific in my own life, it is specific in someone’s life very close to me.) Every one.
Each character could be me, or someone near and dear to my heart.
The six bonus stories included here are no exception. (We’ll sort through the extreme horror characters later, but I’m sure we’ll find ourselves in there somewhere, too.)
I can’t seem to articulate all the emotions I’m experiencing today after all the feels, but no matter what the future holds, TODAY… I want to be a better person.

Bonus Content includes six short stories:
Jon’s Cabin: Touching, and inspirational – the power of love is limitless.
Fly Me Home: Oh my Dog. You know that one country song that you can’t listen to because you instantly turn into a snotty and blubbery mess? Multiply that song times 10.
The Bench: A lifetime of thoughts can pass in a matter of moments.
An entire life can be changed, and damaged even quicker.
I Try My Best: What a roller coaster. I know Ashley’s mom.
A Different Kind of Love Story: This is a truly amazing story.
I’m afraid to blink because I’ll ruin my eye make-up, but my heart is full of warm fuzzies from this Different Kind of Love Story.
Poor Man’s Coat:  ‘People do not value what is truly priceless.’ Outstanding story! I’m running out of ways to tell you how much I’ve changed today.  

P.S. I caught that shout out to William Malmborg 👍 Always a classy move.

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Buy Felo De Se: The Suicide of Jeremy Price on Amazon
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RIP Zombie Boy

Artist & Tattoo Enthusiast Rick Genest

Dead by Suicide at 32

Though horror fans have had Rick Genest aka Zombie Boy on their radars since day one, the artist and tattoo enthusiast achieved worldwide prominence after appearing in Lady Gaga’s video for Born This Way. Indeed, his face is one in a billion; it’s permanently modified to look like a skull, including exposed brains on his cranium. Indeed, the majority of Genest’s skin was inked.

The Montreal native passed away on Wednesday evening at the age of 32. Reports indicate he died by suicide. Thoughts go out to his friends, and family during this difficult period. His bravery and uniqueness were an inspiration for self-described freaks across the world.

If you or someone you know is struggling with depression and need someone to talk to, you can reach the National Suicide Prevention Hotline 24 hours a day at 1-800-273-8255.

 

Original article by Joshua Millican of HorrorFreakNews.com

All I wanna do is trade this life for something new…

R.I.P. Chester Bennington 

DOLLS by Matt Shaw

From Matt Shaw – the author behind the black cover books – comes a terrifying story of lost love and mental illness. Expect twists and turns as he takes you on a dark journey into the depths of a broken mind.

Synopsis:
“He understood why she did it. She had lost her own baby – one conceived by the unwanted advances of a sexual predator – and hated thinking of them out there in the cemetery, alone and cold. She had to bring them into the warm. She had to give them the life they’d otherwise never live. It was her mission. But with each new doll brought home, her yearning for a living child of her own continued to grow. Yes, he knew why she did it but – even so – he wasn’t able to stand by her and he knew she was going to get a lot worse before she got better. But how do you help someone who doesn’t want to be helped? And how do you turn your back on your own sister?”

☆☆☆☆☆ /☆☆☆☆☆
Another 5 Stars For THE Matt Shaw

IDK what stopped me from reading this title earlier, (published February 2, 2016), but I’m happy that I finally did read it! DOLLS feels like one of Matt‘s older titles – it’s not a black cover, not an extreme extreme horror, and the story totally sucked me in. I was 100% invested in the story right from the beginning.  Now, as embarrassing as this might be, I gotta tell ya… I didn’t see the ‘oh holy shit’ moment until about 5 words before it was revealed to us! I love that Matt can still do that after all these years, and all these books.

I’m trying to catch up on a lot of Matt‘s titles that I haven’t’ read and/or reviewed before now, so stay tuned for a couple more ‘not-too-extreme’ extreme story reviews, and for some with the buckets of blood & gore that I expect to be dumped on me very soon ::winks::

Peace, Love & Necrophilia ♥
~sg

DOLLS on Amazon
Matt Shaw‘s Amazon Author Page
DOLLS on Goodreads
Matt Shaw on Goodreads
DOLLS on BookLikes
Matt Shaw on BookLikes
The Sick B*stards Society
Matt Shaw‘s Official Webpage
Matt Shaw on Facebook
@The_Matt_Shaw on Twitter

DOLLS Review/Discussion on BBB – shortlink: http://wp.me/p37DRX-1Fg

THE FUNERAL: An Extremely Twisted SHORT STORY by Matt Shaw

“Before a funeral, there needs to be a death.”

 

 

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WARNING:

This is A SHORT STORY. It is intended for KU members who have been requesting short, sick, bedtime stories. As part of KU they are able to download this title for free.  If you wish for a longer story to read, do not purchase any of the F*cked-Up Shorts titles.  A good place to start would be The Black Cover Books (for lovers of extreme horror).

 

 

* What doesn’t kill you fucks you up mentally. *

The Funeral deals with grief, loss and redemption.
“You can expect twists & turns – be ready to feel a wide range of emotion.”
Never has a truer sentence been written.
Jason is a character that I can relate to.
He’s going through a bad time in his life right now. He is consumed with destructive thoughts, and wrestling with personal demons. Throughout the entire story I found myself laughing at one sentence, close to tears in the next sentence, and nodding my head in agreement at another.
Jason answers a late night phone call that gives him an ‘unexpected distraction’ from his self destructive thoughts, and it’s time for our second ride on that roller coaster!
It is so easy to see parts of myself in Jason, and I’m sure I’m not the only one who will feel this way.

I often find myself wondering if parts of certain stories are based on real events in the author’s life. I did that a lot in this book, especially when Jason thought about moments of happiness that the he shared with his mom. (Matt – go hug your mom!) Not every memory is a great one, there are regrets – just like real life.

The ending was a very unexpected script twist! Trust me… this is one that you wont see coming.

*BONUS POINTS for the ‘failed gas oven suicide attempt’!!  
(Depression + OCD = hilarity!)
*EVEN MORE BONUS POINTS for Jason’s reasons to pass on each method on the internet’s ‘top ten’ list.

 

The Funeral on Amazon
Matt Shaw‘s Amazon Author Page

The Funeral on Goodreads
Matt Shaw on Goodreads

Matt Shaw on Facebook
@The_Matt_Shaw

Smitherd and Shaw ~ Are You Sure? A New Podcast ~ Coming Soon

The Marionnettiste of Versailles and Other Oddities by Adam Millard

Warning: This book contains – A sadistic mortician, demonic teddies, murderous sparrows, sentient robots, scenes of the apocalypse, feeders, lycanthropes, serial-killers, war, jealous housewives, cannibalism, creepy-ass neighbours, suicide, flesh-eating parasites, zombies, cowboys, mothmen, Nyogtha, Appalachian folklore, cancer, asteroids, invisible crocodiles, and voodoo. A collection of previously published and brand new macabre and weird tales from bestselling British author, Adam Millard.

Putting warning labels on books can be better than recommendations. (rawr!)

This anthology contains a wide variety of horrors told in 25 short stories. Some shorts are new to this collection, with additional shorts having been seen previously in different publications. (They were all new to me this time. Bonus.)
Cuddly & creepy stuffed animals, ancient legends re-imagined, and even some disturbing stories of love. In Can You Read That Asteroid from Here? I learned some important tips to follow if I ever get my interstellar drivers license, (‘lefty brakey, righty speedy.’) When I started reading Hair, I thought that Joy Killar had secretly gotten to Adam and had him write about the horrors of finding my stray hairs EVERYWHERE, and about them secretly plotting her imminent demise. But, it was a story about a serial killer who might have appreciated my shedding. Stories like Bug Boy, and 7:17 From Suicide Station didn’t hold back on the ‘bum me out’ vibes, but there were plenty of giggles to even things out. When Gladys confronted her husband about his mistress, her question was ‘What’s She Got That I Haven’t?’, you can imagine the multiple replies that could have fit. But, in the end, there was only one answer. If you’ve read Adam Millard before, you know to expect some dark humor peppered throughout his work. What surprised, (and delighted), me were the Easter Eggs hidden within. I love when authors slyly reference their other works, or revisit characters from other stories. I’m sure that if I had read more of the Adam’s work prior to reading this – I’d have found more. But, that just makes me look forward to reading this again in the future.

You can find The Marionnettiste of Versailles and Other Oddities on Amazon, Goodreads, Library Thing, and Shelfari.

Visit Adam Millard on his website, Amazon, Goodreads, Twitter, Facebook, and Google+.

ANSWER ME!! The First Three – from Jim & Debbie Goad

Answer Me!: The First Three by Jim Goad
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I can’t tell you, for sure, when I first got my hands on this.
I can remember getting one of the first three ‘issues’, mailing away for it to some unknown P.O. Box after a buddy sent me info about it. He said, “Hey, you like fucked up shit, check out this (forgive me…) ‘zine!”
It was perfect – full of dirt, grime, and grainy pictures.
Jim & Debbie Goad were a pissed off couple who hated everything, except each-other, and I was obsessed.
I got a letter some time later. Something personal was happening, so they were putting ANSWER ME! The First Three together in one issue, with a glossy cover and a bit of supplemental material, to raise some dough. I sent for it the same day!
I’ve read this cover to cover HUNDREDS of times.
The pages still leave ink stains on my fingers, it’s beat up and worn.
I still sometimes worry about the person who finds it after I die…
Serial killers, suicides, Dr. Kevorkian – (he was very much alive and in business when they called him. And since the good doctor was dealing death [practicality] right around the corner from me, it was that much cooler!). It still feels wrong, and dirty. I wouldn’t sell it for anything!

I always wanted ANSWER ME! Issue 4, the RAPE issue, and everything else advertised in the back of my copy. I never sent for anything after finding out that the ‘something personal’ that was going on came to a sad end. I didn’t know if address were changed, if people moved around, then it would slip my mind until the next time I picked it up again.
I’m going to stop writing this now, so I can read up on what Jim Goad & Goad To Hell have posted on… Goodreads!? Really?! I’m smirking at this, but… hey – freaks of the world, UNITE! Why not there?

MY BEAUTIFUL SUICIDE (Book 1): By Atty Eve

My Beautiful Suicide by Atty Eve
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Cosette Hugo is living in a world of terror. She’s being stalked and tortured by a vicious enemy, while the world leaders turn a blind eye to the daily atrocities.
You guessed it, Cosette is in high-school!

Cozy has been going through a lot of emotional turmoil – her parents have divorced, her brother Victor was killed shortly after returning home from Iraq, and on top of it all – she’s being bullied at school, but has no idea why. She just wants to get through this last week of school so she can enjoy her bully free winter break.
Outside of school, the town is in a panic over the Poser Gang, who’s list of victims is growing at an alarming rate, and hitting closer to home than she is comfortable with.
Like the title suggests, her emotions lead her to a very final decision… suicide. When Cosette makes the decision to end her life, she is worried about the people she’s leaving behind. Instead of leaving them with the questions, guilt, or shame that her suicide may bring, she believes that getting herself killed might be a better way to go. She chooses to try and become one of The Poser’s victims – but this decision brings out a darker side of her that she never knew existed. A side that excites and terrifies her at the same time.

A deeper look : Includes Spoilers –
View entire SPOILER REVIEW/DISCUSSION

(view spoiler)[Cosette Hugo’s nemisis is Hilda Dyson. Hilda sucks as much as the vacuum, she’s a rotten bitch – and she is Cozy’s Kriptonite.
When Cozy stumbles onto the scene of a Poser attack in progress, something inside her rises up. Anger is drowning out the fear she should be feeling – she cannot let this continue while she stands by and does nothing! As she steps in, she is shocked to see that the victim is none other than Hilda Dyson! Hilda’s attacker is killed in the confrontation, and Cozy cannot be tied into this! Not in any way, shape or form! She makes sure there is nothing on scene that could expose any part of her involvement, makes sure Hilda gets help, then hauls ass.
The idea of these guys in the Poser gang doing this to anyone else makes her blood boil, and this is how she decides to become their next victim. It would take the pain of her suicide off of her family & friends, and if she could take the gang down with her… bonus! Too bad nothing is ever as easy as we imagine.
The problem? Each time she tries to make herself the victim, she ends up killing her attacker! This is where the book takes a wonderfully unexpected and dark turn. Each time Cozy tries to put herself in harm’s way with someone, it awakens something within her – a darker part of herself that enjoys inflicting pain on those who deserve it. She comes down off that high each time like she is sobering up from the effects of a drug. But, just like with a drug, that part of her that is sickened by her actions is quieted each time the high is presented again.
During all this, Cosette is trying to live a normal life. She is trying to make her final days with her mom drama-free, but that’s not always as easy as it sounds. Her mom meets a new friend while on duty at the hospital as a nurse, you’ll see how that impacts their life.
Cozy starts to spend more time with Chris during Winter Break, and they eventually become a couple. Chris has some secrets of his own & they begin a Bonnie and Clyde type relationship. There is one outing in particular that blew my mind! (An even darker side of Cozy is shown, and I hope that this will be a part of any future stories from Atty Eve in this series – In whatever direction the series will end up going.)
Her dad and his new wife (and new life) are the cause of some emotional events after Christmas – Events that will strain the Father/Daughter dynamic. You’ll find out if their bonds are strong enough, or if they break completely.
Her friends are around, too. All these things are included and make the story even better. It may sound like it adds up to a lot, but it ended before I was ready to leave their world! It’s very well balanced.
I could keep going & going until I revealed every single detail of this – but then you wouldn’t read My Beautiful Suicide and I cannot let that happen! So, PLEASE, hurry up and read it so you can come back and talk about it with me!!
(hide spoiler)]

View all my reviews on COVER TO COVER
Buy MY BEAUTIFUL SUICIDE on Amazon
Visit Atty Eve on Facebook
Visit her blog – Atty’s Attic
If the above VIEW SPOILER link or SPOILER REVIEW/DISCUSSION link lags, or is broken –
VIEW SPOILER ON GOODREADS

GIVING UP THE GHOST by Dan Dillard

I received an early copy of GIVING UP THE GHOST from Dan in February. Right when I started it, my dad died. I read it on the plane, going to the funeral. I know this might sound strange to most of you, but, this story helped me get through the next few days! I took much comfort in it. Odd place to find peace, in a horror novel, but I did! The story is excellent! I cried, I laughed out loud, I got angry… I fell in love with these characters.

Gerry Sheffield is a real piece of work. Can’t keep a job, can’t stay any sort of sober, and he has always relied on his parents to bail him out of the trouble he can’t seem to keep himself out of. A grown man who won’t take responsibility.
After a particularly nasty bender, and a run-in with his landlord, Gerry is calling his parents, again – not asking for help as much as demanding their help. After all, they are his parents. It’s their job to look out for their son.
His parents, Margo & Bill, are at the end of their rope.
They’d always tried to help their son. The college tuition that was wasted, the car repairs, the down payment on his now ex-wife’s house, everything. They’re out of patience, and they’re almost out of means. After 27 years, they decide – no more. Clean up your self, clean up your act, put on your big-boy pants & cowboy the fuck up.
The following morning, Gerry gets two checks.
One is for his rent & a thousand bucks for the month.
The second… a great big really check from his dad.
This is it. No more. Sink or swim.
Gerry actually makes a whole-hearted attempt, one last shot to make something of his life, to make his father proud! But, within a day, any chance of walking the straight & narrow is blown. He’s actually made things far worse!
Self righteousness mixed with self pity doesn’t make a good combination. So, once again convincing himself that his problems are all because of someone else, Gerry’s anger helps propel him into calling his parents, to blame Bill & Margo for every single thing that has ever gone wrong in his entire miserable existence. It is bad. He finally says the things that make his parents turn their backs, close their hearts and lock him out. He’s gone too far this time. Realizing what he has done, Gerry’ s hurt eventually gives itself over to hate. And, Gerry lands himself in jail. Again.

Read GIVING UP THE GHOST to find out how far Bill & Margo willing to go to get Gerry to change his ways.
After death, is there anything they won’t do?

GIVING UP THE GHOST by Dan Dillard will be available June 1’st

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The Suicide Story

Let me make this perfectly clear, I DID NOT WRITE THIS. It was written by a young girl named Brianna. I just came across it, while looking for something completely unrelated.
It is so good! I have a few followers that will be interested in this, and please, feel free to reblog, let’s get this story out!
I’m unfamiliar with the site it is posted on, http://www.quotev.com, but, if you click on Brianna’ s name above, it will take you to her profile page there. She has numerous stories. I’m going to try to contact her, to see if she’d like to post anything else here.

The simplified synopsis from the prologue of THE SUICIDE STORY is this…

Eleven letters, ten teens, nine reasons why. The stories will intertwine, and the truth shall be unveiled. But the price is a heavy one. In order for these stories to be told, the girl who knew them took her life. She sent out ten letters to her nine reasons, and one to the person who gave her hope. Each of the ten letters is the same. Each of the ten who receive her letters will learn the ugly truth behind her death. And the recipient of the eleventh letter, the letter explaining how to follow the other letters, will learn what can come from the death of a girl who did not seem like she could change the world.

I love this image. The scalpel as a pen speaks so loudly.

To read THE SUICIDE STORY in full, just click on the title anywhere in this post, or click on the picture below.

How many stories have been told in blood?

thecoloroftears