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“LEATHERFACE – “SAWIN’ YOU APART” (ACHY BREAKY HEART PARODY)”

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Dark Humor Horror

Fan-Girling Like A Boss: A How To Guide To Chosing Your Stalker Style

Whether you’re fan-girling over authors, books, characters, or movies… Never forget these words –

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1. Casual Fangirl

This [book/author/show] is pretty good. You’re definitely going to need the sequel. They are talented, attractive individuals.

Actually, this show is excellent. Is there fanfiction? You won't leave the cast photo as your screensaver for that long ... you needed a new one anyway.

2. Fangirl Lite

Actually, this [book/author/show] is excellent. Show me the cover! I need a new screensaver.

Yes, you've watched the trailer ten times just to make sure you caught all the subtext. And maybe occasionally paused on close-ups of the leads' faces -- just to see what their facial expressions said about the plot. But you're not going to tell anyone about it.

3. Self-Aware Fangirl

Leveling UpYes, you’ve read the synopsis ten times just to make sure you caught all the subtext. And maybe occasionally looked at a close-up of the author’s face — just to see what their facial expressions said about the plot. But you’re not going to tell anyone about it.

You just need a T-shirt with that one quote on it. And maybe a sticker of your favorite character. And an exact replica of that ring they found in that one episode.

4. Collector Fangirl

You just need a T-shirt with that one quote on it. And maybe a sticker of your favorite character. And an exact replica of that thing they found in that one chapter.

The next movie in the series came out, and you read that the actors are trying not to laugh at an inside joke in the last scene. And when the lead actress pointed in the first scene what did she really mean? Maybe you should talk about something else.

5. Fangirl Denial

The next book in the series came out, and you read that the author is trying not to spoil at an Easter egg in the one scene. And when the main character did that thing in the first chapter – what did she really mean? Maybe you should talk about something else for a while.

You know your friends are sick of hearing about your fandom. You know you should talk about something else, but the feels are too overwhelming. You have to share them with someone. Anyone.

6. Fangirl Submission

You know your friends are sick of hearing about your fandom. You know you should talk about something else, but the feels are too overwhelming. You have to share them with someone. Anyone.

The story is just so perfect: the lines, and the way the characters say the lines with their mouths and their voices. How is anyone talking about anything else?!

7. Overtaken Fangirl

The story is just so perfect: the lines, and the way the characters say the lines with their mouths.  How is anyone talking about anythig else?!

You realize you've been a bit obsessive and you feel it's time to apologize to your non-fandom friends for trying to drag them into it.

8. Apologetic Fangirl

You realize you’ve been a bit obsessive and you feel it’s time to apologize to your non-fandom friends for trying to drag them into it.

You discover message boards and fanblogs. There is a whole slew of people just like you. Suddenly, you are obsessing over your Facebook friend list labeled

9. Fangirl Community

You discover message boards and fanblogs. There is a whole slew of people just like you. Suddenly, you are obsessing over your Facebook friend list labeled “People Who Get It.”

After watching that one scene for the hundredth time, the line repeated two seasons later totally makes sense! Did anyone else catch how the lead said

10. Analytic Fangirl

After re-reading that one scene for the hundredth time, the line repeated two books later totally makes sense! Did anyone else catch how the lead said “hey” to his lady friend? They are so in love. Everything makes sense.

This is a level many will skip, as fandoms are supposed to support the community. But if someone doesn't know the name of the restaurant in episode 203? Judging you.

11. Judgmental Fangirl

This is a level many will skip, as fandoms are supposed to support the community. But if someone doesn’t know the name of the restaurant in chapter 7? Screw you!

EVERYTHING IS FANDOM AND EVERYTHING HURTS AND CAPLOCKS ARE THE ONLY WAY TO PROPERLY EXPRESS ALL YOUR EMOTIONS.

12. Raging Fangirl

EVERYTHING IS FANDOM AND EVERYTHING HURTS AND CAPLOCKS ARE THE ONLY WAY TO PROPERLY EXPRESS ALL YOUR EMOTIONS.

Your fandom is the best fandom. Your characters are the best characters. You are not interested in hearing from anyone who disagrees.

13. Unapologetic Fangirl

Your fandom is the best fandom. Your characters are the best characters. You are not interested in hearing from anyone who disagrees.

Completely obsessing over a piece of pop culture can be tiresome, and sometimes you just need a break. Unfortunately that's not going to happen, because there are GIFs to be made and fan art to be drawn.

14. Fangirl Exhaustion

Completely obsessing over a piece of pop culture can be tiresome, and sometimes you just need a break. Unfortunately that’s not going to happen, because there are GIFs to be made and fan art to be drawn.

Whatever style you choose, it’s OK. No wrong answers!

I appreciate your devotion, I stand-by & support you. 

Just keep repeating these words…

fangirl-in-the-window

What’s your #StalkerStyle? Post in the comments below – a judge-free zone.

Categories
PicArt / PicEdit Shenanigans

Stop running! Where are you going?

Categories
In The News

“Stan” Was Just Added To Oxford Dictionaries

View original post on Buzzfeed

Back in 2000, Eminem released “Stan” — a song written about an overly obsessive fan named Stan –

Over the decade and a half since the song dropped, “stan” slowly became a word fanbases used to describe their devotion to a public figure.

And now, it looks like “stan” isn’t going to go ANYWHERE, as Oxford Dictionaries just added the word to its database:


The entry properly sources Eminem as the origin of the word…

Origin
Early 21st century: probably with allusion to the 2000 song “Stan” by the American rapper Eminem, about an obsessed fan.

  • ‘I admit I used to stan for Mariah when I was eight.’
  • ‘I can’t believe this woman has people stanning for her.’
  • ‘I don’t care what anyone says, that performance proves why I have stanned for this man since 1998.’
  • ‘He’s the only gay man not stanning for Beyonce.’
  • ‘I have stanned for Korean pop groups for the longest time, sadly without much success.’
  • ‘I stan for my authors.’ ~ Shadow Girl

Categories
American Horror Story Horror Series television

What You Need to Know Before Tonight’s AHS5: HOTEL Premiere

‘You can check out any time you like…’ 

Less than one hour to go!! 

Who else is going ‘Gaga’ over tonight’s premiere?

Lady Gaga, American Horror Story: Hotel

American Horror Story: Hotel  finally premieres tonight after months of anticipation. And with such a large cast and so many bizarre teasers, we understand if you’re slightly confused as to what exactly you can expect on the FX drama.

So before checking in to the Hotel Cortez, check out this primer on Hotel below.

Who will star:

Lady Gaga as The Countess, the Hotel Cortez’s owner
Kathy Bates as Iris, the hotel’s manager
Matt Bomer as Donovan, The Countess’ lover and Iris’ son
Sarah Paulson as Sally, one of the hotel’s resident junkies
Angela Bassett as Ramona Royale, an actress and former lover of The Countess
Wes Bentley as John Lowe, a detective investigating the 10 Commandments Killer
Chloe Sevigny as Alex Lowe, John’s wife
Finn Wittrock as Tristan Duffy, a male model
Denis O’Hare as Liz Taylor, a hotel employee
Max Greenfield as Gabriel, a Hollywood junkie
Cheyenne Jackson as Will Drake, a fashion icon
Evan Peters as James March, the Hotel Cortez’s original builder
Naomi Campbell as a Vogue editor who insults The Countess
Lily Rabe as Aileen Wuornos, the famed serial killer
Mare Winningham as Ms. Evers, the hotel’s laundress
Darren Criss as a hipster
Madchen Amick as a mother whose sick son receives treatment from Alex

How it’s connected to previous seasons:

Murder House‘s real estate agent Marcy (Christine Estabrook) will return inHotel‘s premiere when she gives Will Drake a tour of the Cortez. But she won’t be the only familiar face returning. According to creator Ryan Murphy, fans will see people from previous seasons checking into the hotel as well.

 

What you can expect:


It’s going to be bloody: Thanks to an ancient blood virus, The Countess and those in her adopted family crave the taste of human blood. But since she lacks vampiric fangs, The Countess uses a deadly tipped glove to slit her victim’s throats before they even know what’s happening.

She also puts a whole new spin on the phrase “bloodlust” when she and Donovan pick up a couple only to murder them mid-foursome. So if you’ve ever wanted to see Lady Gaga screw a dead guy while wearing nothing but pasties and a thong, you definitely won’t want to miss the premiere.

It feels like a real horror movie: Not since Murder House has American Horror Story felt so closely aligned to actual horror. The first half of the premiere plays out like a movie, as we follow two Swedish girls whose stay at the Cortez quickly goes from bad to worse to deadly. And while AHS will always be loved for its campiness, it’s fun to see this extravagance balanced with classic horror tropes.


The mattress imagery will be explained right away: No, it has nothing to do with The Godfather. Or You’ve Got Mail for that matter. But all the mattress-focused teasers will be explained quickly. And once you find out just how true to the show this promo is, you’ll probably think twice about staying in a hotel again.

There’s more than one villain: There are so many evil forces haunting the halls of the Cortez that it can be hard to keep track. But there’s one that is by far more frightening than all the rest: The Addiction Demon. If Rubber Man had a baby with the Infantata, and that baby had a conical drill bit for a penis, then that would be the Hotel’s new monster, which preys on those suffering from addiction.

On the less supernatural side of things, there is also the 10 Commandments Killer, whose Bible-inspired murders are particularly gruesome (think: penis glued inside a dead girl, eyeballs in an ashtray). John Lowe is first lured to the Cortez by a call from the killer, who seems particularly interested in the detective’s life.

The Countess has her fair share of enemies: After being taken in by The Countess in 1994, Donovan has stood loyally by her side. That is, until he finds himself kicked to the curb when The Countess trades him in for a younger, hipper model, Tristan Duffy.

Donovan doesn’t take this spurn lightly, and he isn’t the only one of The Countess’ exes out for revenge. He teams up with another one of The Countess’ former flings, actress Ramona Royale, to get vengeance against the bloodsucking diva.

Watch the cast talk about The Countess’ twisted romances below.

There’s a new man in charge: Unbeknownst to anybody except The Countess, the Cortez changes hands in the premiere when New York designer Will Drake buys it and moves in with his son Lachlan. Will hopes the hotel’s unique energy will help reignite his creative flame, but little does he know just how unique the Cortez is.

And since his arrogant behavior quickly makes enemies of the other residents and employees, Will better watch his back – and keep his son away from The Countess. The fashionista proves she isn’t above recruiting other people’s children into her bloodsucking family.

Not every character is what they seem: Much like Murder HouseHotel leaves you unsure of which of the characters are alive, which are dead and which aren’t quite human. And by the end of the premiere, at least one character’s surprising origin will be revealed.

Get ready for the most disturbing scene yet:

We have seen some terrible things go down on American Horror Story, but trust us when we say that nothing will prepare you for this one. The premiere features an incredibly graphic scene between Gabriel, Sally and The Addiction Demon, who puts its drill bit dildo to horrifying use.

Mr. March is taking cues from H.H. Holmes: Much like H.H. Holmes, who built Chicago’s notorious Murder Hotel during the World’s Fair, James March is a charming, but psychopathic killer who designed the Hotel Cortez specifically to hide his murderous schemes. So while the Cortez is a beautiful art deco building, it’s also a labyrinth of secret rooms, dead ends and shafts. Exactly what Mr. March used these nefarious additions for will be explained when Hotel flashes back to the 1930s.

 

The Halloween episode will be epic:

As always, Horror Story is going all out for Halloween in another anticipated two-parter. The first hour will follow John to a dinner party from hell at the Hotel. (Fingers crossed Alison DuBois will be in attendance.) The other attendees include a handful of famous serial killers, including John Wayne Gacy and Aileen Wuornos, and poor, innocent John mistakenly thinks the entire event is an elaborate prank.

The second part will feature Darren Criss as a hipster who checks into the Cortez with his girlfriend to avoid trick-or-treaters. And unfortunately for them, their elitist attitudes and constant demands inspire the wrath of manager Iris.

Stay away from Room 64:

You know you’ve done something to piss Iris off if she’s assigned you Room 64. Back when the Cortez was originally built, mass murderer James March chose Room 64 as his office. In current day, it has become a playground for deadly mischief, including some of the resident bloodsuckers and The Addiction Demon.

Iris and Sally have a twisted history: As Kathy Bates told us, Iris absolutely loathes Sally because “she’s vile, she’s trash as far as Iris is concerned.” But this hatred of Sally goes far deeper than looking down on Sally’s addictions and it will be revealed by the end of the premiere.

John is deeply connected to the hotel: At first, it seems John has no connection to the Cortez or any of its inhabitants. However, as John investigates a series of murders, the killer’s taunting phone calls lead him directly to the Cortez. And it’s the ongoing threat this killer poses to John’s family that eventually inspires him to move into the hotel’s dangerous Room 64 on a semi-permanent basis.

Is this exactly what the killer wanted? Most likely. Is the killer tied to a tragedy in John’s past? Probably. But the killer isn’t the only thing tying John to the Cortez. Under its roof, John will also find a link to a loss he suffered in 2010 living directly under his nose.

Categories
Horror Humor Shenanigans

A moment in the life of a fangirl…

To

Shadow Girl

Shadow Girl,You have a new follower on Twitter.

Edward Lee
@edwardleeauthor
EDWARD LEE is the author of almost fifty novels and numerous short stories and novellas.
Florida · http://www.edwardleeonline.com

Categories
book discussions Book Reviews Horror Video

DWELLER by Jeff Strand

Eight year old Toby Floren was on an adventure, chasing bank-robbers, and disintegrating aliens in the woods behind his house. He didn’t mean to get lost.
His parents said that monsters aren’t real, and his dad didn’t see anything when they went back to find his knife.
It was just his imagination. That’s all. Monsters aren’t real.

cover

Toby is fifteen now, and uses the woods as a place of solace. They’re somewhere where he can be alone, get away from everything, and think. Seeing the monster scared him again now, just as much as before. But now he’s a little older, and that thing from seven years ago deserves another look…

Fifteen year old Toby found a friend when he found the creature living in the woods. A friend he calls Owen.

DWELLER is Toby and Owen’s story. It’s about a bond formed between two… souls, a friendship that lasts more than fifty years. Like any friendship, there are good times, and bad. Unlike most friendships, there is also blood, and an occasional body to deal with. To be completely honest, there are some parts that are very hard to read through. I was a weepy & snotty mess at times, but I also laughed out loud, too. And – I felt every emotion in between.

Thank you, Jeff  🙂
I want to believe in monsters now.
Everyone deserves an Owen in their life.

You can find DWELLER on Amazon & Goodreads.

UPDATE!!

Fans (like us) are awesome people.  People like Jeff make it easy for us to WANT to be awesome, though.  He’s never too busy to take the time to connect with us, and he honestly loves, and appreciates the little things we do just to try and get other people as excited as we are about his books!  I’ve said before that I’d love to meet Jeff, and it would probably feel like we were just catching up with an old buddy – inappropriate humor and all!  I’d love to meet other fans, too.

If we all got together one night for a #StrandFan get-together,  I wonder if he’d come and bail us all out of jail. (oh, you know it would happen!)  I bet he’d go to the station to bail us out, but somehow end up arrested with us!

I don’t know how I came across this video posted by #StrandFan Chris Morey, but I had to update this review to post it! This is #fangirling to the nth degree! I love this so much, and I can’t wait to stalk the rest of Chris’s videos to see what else is hidden in there.

Yeah… I bet Chris is a guy we could go to jail with…

“Have a listen to the Dweller song and learn something about the book!”

“Dweller is a horror novel written by Jeff Strand. Jeff Strand, if you’re not familiar with him, usually writes with an excellent blend of horror and comedy and is truly a unique voice in the genre today. You’ll fall in love with his style as soon as you get your hands on your copy of Dweller.”

* From Chris Morey’s YouTube channel

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