Erotica

All posts in the Erotica category

Spend Valentine’s with a Lucky Stiff ❣

Published January 15, 2014 by Shadow Girl

LuckyStiff

Need some loving this Valentine’s Day? Looking for a hard body, and don’t care whether it’s dead or alive? Got an itch no one can seem to scratch? Well, I guarantee Peter Lyles will not only scratch that itch, but leave you itching for more! Join Tonia Brown and Peter Lyles (and me, of course!) as we spend Valentine’s weekend giving away his unlife story.
You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll get all worked up and might even have to change your undies.
He is just that good ❣

This Facebook event starts on February 14 at 12:00pm and will continue, hard & strong, until February 16 at 11:45pm ❣
The concept of this event is very simple: You get to spend a virtual weekend in the company of Peter Lyles. He has promised to slip away from his lady friends and spend the weekend answering all of your most intimate questions about his most intimate parts. All the while Tonia will give away free downloads of his undead story, Lucky Stiff: Memoirs of an Undead Lover.

❤ Take a look at the discussion of LUCKY STIFF on the Cover to Cover page ❤

Can’t wait to read it? Than go ahead and grab that bad boy by the horn! Tonia likes money, and you like hot, hot sexy sex. It’s a win-win!

˙·٠•●♥ ❤ Get LUCKY! Have a STIFF Valentine’s Day! ❤♥●•٠·˙

❤ Want to get to know Tonia a little better? See what she had to say when she joined us for BBB’s very first Coffee Talk author interview ~ Coffee with Tonia Brown

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Our Horrifying Childhood

Published June 15, 2013 by Shadow Girl

Nursery rhymes are evil. Seriously, how messed up is it that we sing happy little songs about death, kidnapping, mutilation, animal abuse, slavery, the plague, and monsters? To our children! Maybe they are partially to blame for our HORROR addictions? Now that I’m an adult, I see disturbing sexuality hidden in some of these, too. (Or, perhaps I’m just a sexual deviant & read The Claiming Of Sleeping Beauty too many times.)

Let’s talk about the names behind the nursery rhymes & fairy tales.
The Brothers Grimm. Like… The Grimm Reaper? Grimm is defined as forbidding & uninviting. Mother Goose? Geese are assholes! Have you ever been chased down by a demented bird with teeth and a taste for blood? I have.

TEETH!

TEETH!

This pic is what sparked this blog post – a Betty Page type as Little Miss Muffett.
Although LMM doesn’t have a really sinister background, it includes spiders. Spiders suck. Little Miss Muffet was the first “documented” person with arachnophobia. And, WTF IS a tuffet?

Little Miss Muffet

Sat on a tuffet,

Eating her curds and whey;

Along came a spider,

Who sat down beside her,

And frightened Miss Muffet away.

Quite contrary Mary is Queen ‘Bloody’ Mary. She’s addressed first-hand about all of the poor saps she’s sent to the graveyard (her garden). The silver bells refer to instruments of torture that crushed the thumb with the tightening of a screw, and cockleshells (heh) were torture devices that were attached to the genitals.
The maids in the final line allude to the newly invented guillotine, which was nicknamed The Maiden.
mary3

Mary Mary quite contrary,

How does your garden grow?

With silver bells and cockleshells

And pretty maids all in a row.

Queen ‘Bloody’ Mary is enough of a sociopath to have more than one nursery rhyme. Three Blind Mice was also rumoured to be about her. The farmer’s wife in the poem is an allusion to “Bloody” Mary, and her enthusiasm for everything involving torture, death, and basically finding new ways to go down in textbooks as history’s biggest bitch. The three mice supposedly represent three noblemen who got together and said, “Gee guys, maybe this Mary lady isn’t all there.” and were consequently prosecuted for conspiring against the queen. About the cutting off of their tails… I’ll give you three guesses as to what that symbolizes. The first two guesses don’t count.
mice

Three blind mice, three blind mice,

See how they run, see how they run,

They all ran after the farmer’s wife,

Who cut off their tails with a carving knife,

Did you ever see such a thing in your life,

As three blind mice?

Even if the back-story of Bloody Mary is b.s., it’s still a story about a trio of unfortunate rodents on a mission to find out where the hell they are, eventually run into an old woman who just happens to be skilled in chopping small defenseless animals to pieces. It’s actually already kind of disturbing on its own.

Georgie Porgie? Torrid gay sex scandal.
Pudding and pie? Use your imagination. Your filthy, filthy imagination.

Georgie Porgie pudding and pie

Kissed the girls and made them cry

When the boys came out to play

Georgie Porgie ran away

Hey Diddle Diddle?
Star-crossed, socially unacceptable lovers running away together.
Interracial, homosexual, or religious differences?
All of the above. Plus more, I’m sure.

Goosey Goosey Gander?
Whores, rapists, and VD.
Pop Goes The Weasel?
Either animal cruelty of a statement about poverty.
Ring Around The Rosey?
The Black Death.
Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater?
Kidnapper, sadist, and social deviant.
No hidden meaning on these, but they’re disturbing nonetheless –
Jack & Jill?
Dude cracked his skull and his Betty tumbled down quickly thereafter.
Rock-A-Bye Baby?
Infant stashed in the tree so parents could party, baby falls & splats.
London Bridge?
If the bridge is crumbling into the water, doesn’t that mean cars full of people are too?
The Old Woman Who Lived In A Shoe had multiple brats and no baby daddy(s) to speak of. She starved and beat the hell out of her kids. Teaches the kiddies that Social Services & ADC won’t ever rescue them.

Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep and the sing-song It’s Raining, It’s Pouring, both have people going to sleep, only to never awake again! I remember being afraid of Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep as a child. I cried and begged my mom not to make me say my prayers before bed!

It’s no wonder that sweet little kids grow up to be the Geins, Dahmers, and Mansons of the world if this is the kind of literature pounded into our subconscious from birth.

This post wouldn’t be complete without a mention of 2 Live Crew –

Or Andrew ‘Dice’ Clay –
http://pctechtalk.com/topic/80155-andrew-dice-clay-dirty-nursery-rhymes/
&

What nursery rhyme or bedtime story scared the bejesus out of you as a child? Do you repeat these to your kids? Why or why not?

P, L, & N ❤
~sg

LUCKY STIFF: MEMOIRS OF AN UNDEAD LOVER By Tonia Brown

Published March 16, 2013 by Shadow Girl

Lucky Stiff: Memoirs of an Undead Lover
By Tonia Brown
cover

Zombie Erotica. You know these individual words, but these words together? It gives you a ‘o.O’ moment. Zombie Erotica could lead to some very disturbing thoughts and imagery. Let me assure you, this is not a disgusting or disturbing story! Quite the contrary. Tonia is a master at erotica, and a master at zombies, for LUCKY STIFF she brings the two together and creates a novel like none other. A novel that induced laughter, tears, excitement, and a little tingly feeling in the nether-regions ::winks:: Yes. She’s that damn good.
This is a story about one of my favorite Peter characters. (You read my posts, you know who the other one is. THIS Peter is the original Peter in my literary love life. Peter Lyles.)

Peter and his buddies are off on an epic Spring Break trip, one that they’re going to make sure ends up in the record books. Off to New Orleans for some much needed R & R, their vacation takes a wicked wrong turn when Peter downs a fistfull of Roofies – instead of the sleeping pills his friend ‘Drugstore Dave’ said they were. A few hours later… Dave, Jack, and Mooch find Peter right where they left him – only now he’s cold to the touch & blue! While freaking out and contemplating a future filled with back-door invasions from their prison husbands, Mooch remembers Madam Sangrail – the Voodoo Queen, from his old neighborhood. “People said she could do things. Or… un-do them.” Madam Sangrail’s flavor of magick¹ brings back an undead Peter – a kind of undead you’ve never known existed, but, the kind of undead that makes the impending Zombie Apocalypse sound like it might not seem so bad!

Be sure to check out my interview with Tonia, links to her and all her work HERE, in the ‘Coffee Talk‘ pillow fort!

This was the first book of Tonia’s that I read, it’s the book that led to my first real conversation (& eventual unbreakable bond) with Joy Killar, which led to meeting & becoming friends with Tonia! Funny how life works. All this from downloading a sample of a book because a book cover discovered during a Google image search intrigued me!

¹ Magick: Not to be confused with stage “magic.” Magick is art of utilizing natural forces around us to bring about change. Magick is neutral, neither good, nor evil. The practitioner decides how they would like to focus this natural energy.

‘Affliction’ by Laurell K Hamilton: Update

Published February 18, 2013 by Shadow Girl

COMING JULY 2013

From the blog of Laurell K. Hamilton

Affliction will be out July 2, 2013! Why isn’t it in June like normal? I was writing along on Affliction, and it was slow going, which isn’t usual for me at the beginning of a book. The book seemed to be fighting me and I wasn’t sure why, this usually happens when plot, or character, are not conforming to my initial idea and I’m refusing to make the change that the character wants. The book and I continued to duke it out, and I had some all time low daily page counts after page 150, that’s usually the moment that a book gains momentum, unless . . . unless it’s going to be longer than planned. My deadline was coming, I didn’t have time for substantially longer. You see the problem, right? Books are like legs, they need to be as long as necessary to reach the ground, otherwise you have serious problems with walking, running, and just moving forward in general. The more I tried to keep things under control, the harder it got, and the slower I wrote. What I had on the page was good, and I was having fun while writing, but still there was something wrong. Early on I’d told my editor that Edward might be in the book, but as we neared page 300 I assured her that he wasn’t going to be in it, because if he was going to show up that he would have put in an appearance by now. You see it coming, don’t you? Yep, you guessed it, Edward strolled on stage after page 300. Now, I love Edward. I love writing him. Anita loves to work with him. He is her best friend, after all. Yes, I know that she needs a girl best friend again, since she and Ronnie had a parting of philosophies, but since my best friend, not counting my husband Jon, is male, I guess it makes sense that Anita would gravitate that way, too. Edward’s first scene was perfectly him, and wonderful interaction between him and Anita. It was great! I always love their dialogue. Here’s the problem, any time Edward steps on scene a book is guaranteed to be at least a 100 pages longer than I had planned, and usually between 150-200 pages longer. That’s great for you readers, but I still have to write the pages and meet my deadline. Affliction was plotted out to be a long book anyway, but adding Edward so late in the game, I knew was in trouble. I called up my wonderful editor, Susan, and told her I wasn’t making my December deadline, it just wasn’t happening, was there anyway to make a later deadline? So, that’s how we ended up with the book moving to July, and my deadline moving to February, because I needed the time to play with all the characters that kept insisting they would be on stage this book. Not only is Edward a surprise guest star, but Jean-Claude has a much bigger role than I had planned on, and the Wicked Truth are on stage, which I was trying to avoid. I love them, and they are yummy, but when I started nearing 500 pages I thought we had all the familiar characters we were going to introduce in this book, and yet, when I stop typing this I will be finishing their introduction scene for this book. Introducing two minor major characters at nearly page 500? What the hell? I mean, you just don’t introduce people this late in the game if the book is going to stop soon, right? Right? Argh!!!! I love everyone and the book reads well, Jon is really enjoying what he’s gotten to read, as has my editor, but come on all you fictional guys and girls, enough already! I got a deadline to make! I now realize that one of the things that has slowed my page rate per day is that I’m still fighting the book. I’m still trying to force it into the smaller shape I had planned. I have to stop fighting myself and just let the book be what it’s going to be. My goal for the day is to stop worrying about how many characters are in the book and how late in the game they are stepping on stage and just write. It’s really all I can do, write, and let my imaginary friends have their heads, and like a horse that I’ve been fighting to hold back in a race, I’m hoping that once I give them their heads we’ll pick up speed and fly past that finish line ahead of the pack.

Posted by LKH at 12:27:34 am on January 30, 2013

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